The following is an email exchange between a woman and me about her troubles getting her husband on board with Paleo. I think a lot of people will be able to relate to this scenario, whether it’s your husband, wife, brother, or friend. Please share in the comments what you’ve done to help your significant other see the light :)
Basically, when I met my husband, I was 30 lbs lighter (as was he). I was obese to begin with (270 lbs and 5’4″) and so that extra 30 has really taken a toll on my body.
I lost the 30 I had gained with My Fitness Pal, and then I got pregnant. I gained that 30 back during pregnancy and still have not yet gotten around to even starting to lose it. (And my son turns a year this month).
Anyway, my point to this email is, I really want to start the Paleo way of eating (or at least mostly… with our schedule and other functions, it won’t be 100% but I’d like to shoot for 80%). However, I am having a REALLY hard time convincing my husband that refined foods/processed foods and soda are bad for him. We’ve had many arguments over it. If I cook dinner, he’ll eat it, but not breakfast or lunch. And then, he’ll still get a bunch of soda, junk food, or candy every day for snacking.
I’ve thought of just separating our eating, but that will almost double our already-large food bill (5 people in our household).
Do you have any advice on how to get him to at least somewhat on board or excited about this?
Any help is appreciated!
PS – I’ll be signing up for your weekly meal plans on December 6th. I’m very excited!
That’s a tough question. Unfortunately, sometimes diet advice is the WORST coming from spouses and family members. Giving people books by experts often works well, but only if that person actually wants to change. Having said that, here are some tips for you.
Talk It Out
Maybe have a sit down with him and explain that this is incredibly important to you, not only because it will make YOU healthier and happier, but because it’ll make him healthier as well, which means you get to spend more of your life together as happy healthy people.
Let The Computer Do The Talking
Maybe sit down with him at the computer and read through the hundreds of testimonials on www.marksdailyapple.com and other sites, including this one. Every Friday marksdailyapple.com features a person who’s changed their life and health with a Paleo or Primal diet. Maybe they can inspire your husband. Or just google “Paleo testimonial” and feast your eyes on the stunning results you get.
While I’m actually not a fan of spousal threats–and only use them myself when I REALLY want something :)–you could tell him that if he doesn’t do this with you, your food bill will increase too much, and you’re not willing to NOT do it, so he needs to comply.
The Old “Anyone can do anything for 30 days” Trick
You could say to him, “Let’s just try this for a month. You can do anything for a month, right?” and then gently remind him of all his aches and pains, the medications he’s on (if he’s on any), his blood work results (if they were negative), and his weight (if he needs to lose weight), etc. You know – the things he probably conveniently forgets about so he doesn’t have to deal with them (we all do it!). Just remind him ever so kindly that he may feel better – that it’s possible that all of the bad stuff will just go away – if he changed his diet.
I will say that there are a lot of people out there who just start doing this on their own, no matter what the financial cost, and their partners see such drastic improvements in them that they’re inspired to try it themselves. Maybe that’s what might have to happen for you guys?
Nobody knows your husband like you do, so work your magic on him! But like I said, he needs to want to change on his own, and I sincerely hope you can help him get to that place.
Ok, good luck to you!